Monday, May 27, 2013

Pulling

He is the baby of His family. His siblings agreed that He was coddled because of it. However, He doesn't remember being indulged in any way. Maybe that is because we don't see those things ourselves. If I were to believe that He were though, I guess I could count maybe nine or ten years where the said babying would have occurred, (my reasoning is that after 5th grade little boys grow into big boys, and their innocent demeanor looses its sweetness). Therefore, at the most His cocoon only lasted for ten years, (this needs to be said because siblings keep score far into adulthood). Studies also suggest that youngest children have fewer rules placed on them, thus making them more likely to shirk accountability and become less reliable. Well people are also more complex than studies may suggest.

It was during college that His position in His family transitioned into the eldest in terms of responsibility. When His father needed someone to help with family issues, he asked Him. He could be counted on to show up and do what needed to be done. His willingness to take on these family responsibilities began a slow slide into where His siblings began calling Him when they needed help. While His father was ill with cancer, He took it on Himself to intercept any problems from reaching His father. During the same time His mother turned to Him when she needed help with some serious issues that her husband would have usually taken care of. This was a very stressful time for His family.




Unfortunately, quite a few family issues cropped up during this very taxing time. He took care of them. Whatever it entailed. However, His family responsibilities did not end with the death of His father, as catastrophes are always looming on the horizon, (and which continue to creep up year after year). The thing that both annoys and impresses me is that His helming the family problem ship has continued far beyond the limits of His ten year stint as the baby who was coddled. If He had a penance to carry it out it was fulfilled a long time ago. He didn't want the position as head of the family, but it was placed on His shoulders by unspoken mutual family consent, and I have watched Him take it on with confidence, tact and equanimity. Somebody had to help with the load, and He put His head through the oxbow.

He bears the yoke...

...one more reason I love Him.

 

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